Parent Advice from United Way's, Robin Lindsay!

Pretentious, evidence-based parenting advice from our very own: Robin Lindsay, family nurse practitioner and Help Me Grow child development coordinator.

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Regaining Control. When your child is losing control, first you must contain yourself and don't add to the to your child's frustration. Hugging and containing techniques are great tools to collect and calm. Your child will know you will hold her till she is calm. Once, the tension has weakened this is a good time to talk about what happened.

Interrupting Children. Children are easily absorbed into a task they are doing and do not like being interrupted. For an easier transition to change focus, give your child a verbal warning, for example "In five minutes breakfast will be over and we will brush our teeth. Now is the time to finish what you are eating." Repetition is important so the child can process the information.

Dealing with Frustration. "Frustration is a healthy force for learning as long as the child's given opportunities to master the frustration." When your child is learning new tasks be patient, it may take time. If she becomes overly frustrated or asks for your assistance, step in. If she does finish the task alone, she will feel empowerment which leads to confidence in conquering other tasks.

Avoiding unnecessary refusals. It's better to use yes over no to your child's requests. Try to avoid using no give them an explanation or choice, for example "I can't go outside with you right now. If you will read or do blocks we can go out in half an hour."

Extending Play. This is a great technique to build your child's problem solving skills. It's important to ask questions about what she's doing, and asking her to describe how she'll use it or what it is called, etc. This stretches development for learning math and reading skills.

Decisions Making Skills. Give your child the choice. Offer many different options for them to choose from. As she gets older and understands you better talk about their choice and if she may choose differently the next time.

Discipline, is meant to be teaching and shouldn't involve punishment. It is to encourage a child to develop self discipline. Discipline requires patience and respect for the child, age appropriate activities, firm limits and rules with consistent follow through, and belief that child and parent both will get better at it.

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